50 Shades of Pink Read online

  Her forehead knitted. “Did Colette fire you because I cancelled dinner?”

  I jumped up from the bed and hugged my arms to my chest. Always with Colette!

  “No, she didn’t fire me, but I’ll never be her assistant now or have a shot at becoming a writer for Virago or any other magazine if she has her say.”

  “You can always come work for me, if you’re interested.”

  I didn’t miss Victoria’s smug expression. I lowered my arms and curled my fingers into my palms. “It isn’t funny. I’ve lost the respect of someone I once admired. I can’t afford to lose my job, and I refuse to return home to my parents a failure.”

  “I won’t let you run home to your parents crushed because of.…” She stood and folded her arms behind her back. “I’m not your favorite person right now, but there’s a reason I had to speak to you and why I brought you back here. I also have a good excuse why I didn’t make our dinner. If you stay for breakfast, I’ll explain why.”

  “Why should I stay? It’s not going to help my situation. Unless you want to make yourself feel better for screwing me over.”

  Remorse floated in Victoria’s eyes, or perhaps I tricked myself into seeing that. I couldn’t figure out this enigma of a woman who turned my emotions upside down. What did she want with me?

  “It was never my intention to screw you over. You became an unwilling victim of a situation between two people who can’t let the past go.”

  That statement held so much behind it, and yet it was still cryptic enough that I had to know more. If I stayed, perhaps she would finally open up to me.

  “If I have breakfast with you, will you tell me why you missed our dinner, and about you and Colette?”

  Her nod was slight, but one of agreement. “Anything we discuss here will be off the record?”

  “It’ll be way-way off the record since I’m back to being a lowly research assistant.” Hopelessness lodged in my chest, a horrible vision of me stuck in the same position for the next few decades.

  “Stop putting yourself down,” she said in a softer tone. “Take a shower. Everything you need is in the bathroom. I’ll call down to the concierge to have them tell the kitchen to bring up our breakfast.”

  “You have a concierge?” I didn’t bother to hide my amazement.

  “Every property owner in the building has their own personal twenty-four hour concierge and housekeeping. The kitchen staff is always on call. It’s one of the many perks in owning a twenty-million dollar penthouse.”

  Whoa. “Must be nice,” I whispered, thinking of how unimpressed she would be about my four-story walkup that didn’t have any type of security. My monthly rent was a drop in the bucket for her.

  “I’m luckier than most. I don’t take anything for granted,” she said in a slight definitive tone. “Go shower. I’ll be in the living room.”

  “Ah, Victoria,” I held out my hand even though her back was to me. “Whose clothes am I wearing? You have a man stored somewhere I don’t know about?”

  She started to close the door. “The T-shirt belonged to a friend, much like your Jayden. He never asked for it back.”

  She then shut the door on any other questions I wanted to ask.

  ***

  I took my time in the shower, washing away the funk from last night. The steam from the hot water cleared my head, pushing aside my anxiety that had stayed with me the past few days. I wasn’t cut out for the excitement and drama that had been thrown at me. Maybe I was the type of person who did better with a boring, average life. I had never tried for greatness, just wanted some bigger perks I’d always dreamed about.

  Victoria Nox was far from boring or average. She had a life most would sell their soul for, but there was a dark side to it, based on what I’d witnessed and how distant and emotionally detached she appeared to be. She also seemed quite lonely. At least I could say I never felt alone. I had great friends and a loving family, even thousands of miles away. Plus they were all rooting for my success, which for now was on hold.

  I finished my shower smelling of lavender, the same scent Victoria used. Now I smelled like her. It cheered me up for some reason.

  I put back on the T-shirt and shorts I had slept in. Finding a comb in a bag along with other hair styling products on the bathroom counter, I fixed my hair, leaving it wet, but tucking it behind my ears. I looked more awake, although I wouldn’t win any beauty awards.

  Rechecking the bedroom, I didn’t find my clothes or my purse. But at the foot of the bed were slippers, which weren’t there earlier. Also a cotton robe lay on the bed. The bedroom door had been closed while I showered, but now was open a crack. Victoria must have placed these items inside. It gave me a warm fuzzy feeling.

  After putting on the slippers and the robe, I took one last glance in the mirror. I still looked the same like I did every day. But at least Victoria had dressed down and not in some glamorous get up with her hair and makeup perfect, wearing some silk nightgown and robe like I imagined some of the rich and famous did.

  I exited the bedroom, trying not to slip on the marble floor. I turned the corner to a large open room with couches and loveseats. To the left was an entertainment system with a wide screen television. To my right was the kitchen with state of the art appliances. An assortment of pastries and fruit had been set out on the island in the middle. Victoria stood next to it, drinking from a mug and reading a magazine.

  I cleared my throat and she scanned me from head to toe. “You found the robe and slippers. Good.”

  I rubbed my arm, enjoying the soft cotton on my skin. “Both were easy to find. But where are my clothes and my purse?”

  “Your clothes have been washed and your purse is on the table in the den.” She sat her mug and magazine down. “And no, I didn’t go through your purse or check your phone.”

  “I didn’t accuse you of either. I don’t have anything to hide.” Unlike you.

  “I know you aren’t hiding anything. You’re an open book. Remember, I had you investigated.” she said in a matter-of-fact tone.

  “How could I forget?” I rolled my eyes. It would take me awhile to get used to Victoria knowing all about me, while she was still a mystery. “You must have spent a lot for not much of a payoff. There’s nothing in my past you can use to threaten or blackmail me with.”

  “The money was well spent.” She lifted the mug to her mouth, humor sparking in her eyes. “I’m not going to blackmail you.”

  There was a ‘but’ there. Then again, maybe I was paranoid. She continued to stare me down, as if she waited for me to say something more. I broke her gaze and searched for my purse, which was easy to find. She didn’t follow me out of the kitchen and continued drinking from her mug.

  After checking inside my purse, I took out my phone. Sitting on the couch, I scrolled through the various text messages, most from Jayden and one or two from Maxine. I had a few missed calls and voice messages also. I read through the texts, their words of worry and concern, wondering where I was and if I was okay.

  “Your phone kept ringing until I answered it. Jayden was distraught but I explained you were with me safe and sound in my bed.” Victoria walked in the room.

  “You told him I was in your bed? He’ll think—”

  “He’ll think what, Lindsay?” She sat on the arm of the couch, looking way too smug.

  “You took advantage of me. I’ve never, ever would have a one night stand—”

  “What makes you think it would be a one night stand?”

  My face started to burn. “Stop teasing me.”

  “Why do you think I’m teasing you? There’s nothing wrong with a one-night stand if those involved know the rules. I’m not big on romance, and I find displays of affection frivolous, but I do like to fuck.”

  I flinched. “That sounds so cold. I’m the complete opposite. If I’m going to have a lover, she better give me romance.”

  She gave me a bitter smile. “Ah, you’re one of those. You want flowers and ha
nd holding as you walk in the park. You want your first time with candles and rose petals on silk sheets.”

  I gripped my cell hard, the urge to toss it at her head. “After all the people you’ve been with, not one of them romanced or seduced you?”

  She laughed, but there was no happiness behind it. “Someone can be seduced without romance. It’s very easy to do.” She stood. “They can control your body and mind until you’re begging them to take you and use you as they seem fit.”

  That sounded so cold. “Can we switch to another topic, like why you bailed out on me on Tuesday night?”

  “As a guest in my home, I’ll concede to your wishes.” She stepped toward the kitchen. “We’ll eat at the kitchen table instead of in the dining room.

  I moved off the couch and followed, noticing the long dining room table. “You like eating in the kitchen better?”

  She held two plates, one of which she handed to me. “Don’t most people? The table in the dining room is more for show. I rarely entertain here. I eat in the kitchen or in my home office.”

  “I usually eat on the couch and watch television. Jayden eats dinner with me.” Most nights we ate dinner together unless he had other plans.

  “And what about Maxine? Does she join you or perhaps she invites you over to her place for a romantic dinner without Jayden?” Victoria added some fruit and a croissant to her plate.

  “You know who Maxine is from having me investigated?” I added some bitchiness to my tone as I selected a bagel and some jam.

  “It’s easy to figure out since she shares the same last name as your roommate.” She set her plate down on the table but didn’t sit. “She was the one you were kissing in the alley before the gunfire erupted.”

  The knife I used to cut my bagel slipped and landed on the plate. My stomach bubbled and it wasn’t because I was hung over. “Were you spying on me? Why do you care who I kiss?”

  She popped a blueberry in her mouth and chewed. “I wasn’t spying. You were out in the open. Anyone could see you. It just happened to be me.”

  “You enjoy being a voyeur?” I picked up the knife I dropped and smeared a good amount of jam on my bagel.

  “I didn’t enjoy watching you with another woman, if that’s what you’re asking.” She sat and poured orange juice in two glasses.

  “I’m not sure if I should ask you any more questions right now. I may lose the little appetite I have.” I tore a section of my bagel off and bit into it. The warm bread hit the spot.

  Victoria indicted the chair next to her. “Why don’t you sit down? I promise to behave.”

  “Is that a request or an order?” I asked, my mouth full of bread.

  “It’s whatever you would like it to be.” She drank from her glass, a dare in her eyes.

  This was a new side to Victoria. Playful but with an underlying harshness to it. It seemed she normally didn’t have this type of interaction with others. She was trying to relax but she was still too stiff, as if she expected me to lash out at her and she needed to protect herself.

  I grabbed my plate and the bowl of mixed fruit and joined her at the table. “Since I’m thirsty and you have the juice, I’ll sit with you.”

  She welcomed me with a satisfied smile. I sent her one back.

  We ate in companionable silence. I had a slew of questions I could have asked her, specifically about Tuesday night, but I held off, enjoying my meal. She would tell me in her own time, and no amount of pressure or cajoling from me would make her tell me what I wanted to hear.

  Her cell pinged but she didn’t answer it, although she glanced at the phone number flashing across the screen.

  “If you want to answer your phone, I can go in the other room.” I pushed my chair back to give her the space.

  She lifted a finger. “No stay. It’s just my Aunt Regina.”

  “She’s the one who took you in after your parents died?”

  She nodded. “And my Uncle Bruce. The reason I canceled on dinner was because of a family emergency. My uncle isn’t well. He has Alzheimer’s and heart problems. He had another heart attack on Tuesday and I visited him at the hospital.” For once she didn’t keep her gaze on my face, but focused past my shoulder. Lines bracketed her mouth as she pursed her lips together.

  “I’m sorry.” I leaned forward and took her hand. “My granddad had Alzheimer’s. He passed away my senior year of college.”

  “Which side?” She curled her fingers around mine.

  “My father’s.”

  “I never knew my grandparents on either side. They died when I was too young to remember them. I’m named after my maternal grandmother — Victoria Emeline.”

  “I didn’t know that.” I kept my still, not wanting to break the moment.

  “Other than my immediate family, no one else knows. Colette doesn’t.” she said, her lips twisting into a grimace. She jerked her hand away and rose from her chair.

  I fisted my hand, wanting to smack the table. Always back to Colette!

  She put her plate in the sink, staring at me in silence.

  I met her gaze as I crossed my arms over my chest. “You don’t have a problem telling me private family matters such as your sick uncle or how you were named after your grandmother. But when it comes to you and Colette, you’re too vague. What’s your deal with her and why am I involved in this mess?” The tartness from the juice I drank burned my throat. I couldn’t believe it took me this long to figure it out. “The interview she wanted me to do with you was never real. It was her way of antagonizing you, and using me as the bait.”

  “She likes her games.” Victoria rubbed her arms and shivered. “Eighteen years later she’s still playing them. You’re not her first victim and you won’t be her last.”

  My pulse filled my ears and my heart thumped against my chest. “You’re scaring me.”

  “I don’t mean to. She’s not out to get you. It’s me she wants.” She released a hollow laugh. “She thought she had me this time by using you because of how naive and sweet you are.”

  “I don’t know if I should be insulted or not.” I slouched down in my chair.

  Victoria laughed again, but this time with more humor behind it. She came back over and reclaimed her seat. “You give off an innocent vibe. It’s not a bad thing. But to a person like Colette, she can manipulate that goodness and use it to her advantage.”

  “I’m not as innocent as you make me out to be. I’ve lived pretty much on my own in one of the biggest cities in the United States since I’ve been eighteen.” I lifted my chin, proud of the fact.

  “That may be true, but you don’t have the same world experience Colette or I have. We live by a different set of rules.”

  “Because you have money and power?”

  She placed her hands on my arms, bending forward until she was practically in my lap. “Yes. Money and power can corrupt. Colette has always been surrounded by wealth. Her older brother gives her whatever she wants as long as he gets something in return. I can help you escape her before it’s too late.”

  “Why do you think she wants anything more to do with m-me?” I asked in a hushed voice. “I’m no one.”

  Victoria took my hands and clasped them under her chin. “You’re someone to her. You remind me of someone I was once very close to in college.”

  “What happened to that someone you were close to?” I asked, bracing myself for the worst.

  “She died because I chose her over Colette.” Victoria lowered her face to my hands and exhaled hard. “Colette wanted revenge because I fell in love with someone who wasn’t damaged, like me.”

  “D-damaged? What do you mean?”

  She lifted her face, pale and withdrawn. “I’m damaged. Colette made sure when she seduced me when I was fourteen. We were lovers until I was twenty.”

  Oh god. I darted up from the chair and ran to the sink to throw up.

  Chapter Nine

  “I’m sorry I made a mess.” I sat on the couch in the living room wr
apped in a blanket and wearing a pair of Victoria’s yoga pants to replace the shorts I dirtied. I drank some warm herbal tea to calm my stomach

  “It wasn’t too bad. Most landed in the sink.” She sat at the dining room table, the farthest distance possible.

  “I didn’t end up sick because of what you told me. The orange juice did a number on my stomach.” I wouldn’t drink any type of juice for a long time.

  “Sure.”

  She didn’t believe me. I heard the hesitation in her voice and with every breath she took. The detached haughtiness had returned.

  I kept my hands curled around the mug for warmth. I was the coldest I had been in a long time. It would take some time for me to digest that my boss, a woman admired by so many, had sexually abused a child.

  “Why did you finally tell me what Colette did to you? That’s a big accusation.”

  “I’m not accusing. I’m just stating a fact.” Victoria left her seat by the table and joined me on the couch.

  “Why me?” I asked, my voice cracking. It was all too much.

  “You’re easy to talk to.” She tucked a piece of my hair behind my ear.

  I was about to lose it. I set the mug down on the floor, not caring if it spilled and started to rock. Victoria’s arms came around me and I hid my face in her chest and sobbed.

  “I-I’m so sorry.” Tears clogged my throat. Victoria hushed me, rubbing my head and sifting her fingers through my hair.

  “Why am I upset and you aren’t?” I peered up at her, at a total lost why I was so emotional.

  “I’ve learned to control my emotions.” She stroked the side of my face.

  That didn’t sound healthy to me, but then again, Victoria and I came from two different worlds. “What happens now?”

  “With us?”

  I skirted back and wiped my gritty eyes. “I meant with Colette. Why hasn’t she been punished for what she did to you?”

  “Punished how?”

  “The law!” Irritated, I shot up from the couch.

  Victoria hung an arm along the back of the couch and tucked her feet under her, looking totally calm and collected, unlike me. “She was taken care of once before. She knows the ramifications if she antagonizes me too much.”