Shame of It All Page 21

  “Is Ari your new best friend?” I rested my cheek on his shoulder.

  “He’s a good man. He should fare well after we finish here.” He curled his hand behind my neck.

  I yawned and snuggled closer to him. “I should lie down soon.”

  “You will after you eat.” He drew his fingers through my knotted hair. “I haven’t decided what to do with Ms. Yeaton.” He rubbed his nose on my cheek. “She almost took you from me. It’s something I won’t forgive.”

  “You don’t have to forgive, but you can be merciful. Her life is ruined for what she did to me. I pity her because she never had a chance.” I cupped his face and pressed my forehead to his. “She’s a victim of Colt’s like me. For that, he still has to pay. I want him to suffer for the damage he’s done to so many women.”

  “Hahn still has no idea of what’s coming to him. He’s either very stupid or thinks he’s invisible. He has returned to Cartleigh and acts as if everything is normal. He hasn’t visited Ms. Yeaton or inquired about your health.”

  “He’s selfish. Always has been.” I shifted back and caressed his face. There was murder in his eyes. He wouldn’t take the pleasure away from me in bringing down Colt. It was mine and always had been.

  “What Agnes did is a small bump, a slight roadblock in my plan.”

  “Our plan.” He fisted his fingers deeper in my hair but it didn’t hurt.

  “Always us.” I patted his chest and then lowered my face there even though the slight stretching made the pain in my arm attack my head.

  “We finish this now.” He sighed my full name like a prayer.

  CHAPTER SIXTEEN

  It took five days of rest and staying off my feet so they healed. I ate as much breakfast as I wanted since Ari kept feeding me. Having a man like Ari cook for me was a nice perk in my healing process. But I slept alone unless Herriot joined me. Yakim visited but, out of respect for the doctor in his home, he acted more like a concerned boss than a friend and lover.

  I didn’t dream or think much of the past. I thought of the future. Then I was ready. I couldn’t wait much longer. I had to finish. I was back on my feet so to speak. I wore ballerina flats instead of my knee-high stiletto boots I had wanted to wear along with my crimson blazer dress for my final confrontation with Colt. But my double-breasted carmine cape blazer and tailored pants set would have to do. It hid the marks Agnes left on my body. It was a good enough armor because this last meeting would be very different in tone from all the other times I had seen Colt.

  The other two men in my life were left in the dark. I gave no indication of my appointment. Ari was at his practice, and Yakim at the Alzmeya’s temporary headquarters. But he would know what I was up to once I left Ari’s house. The town car with the two men inside would report to him as soon as I got in an Uber to ride to the municipal building where Colt worked.

  The mayor’s office was in the oldest building in Cartleigh. It was a national landmark and would be here long after Colt and I left this earth. But I would leave my mark, even if only a few people were aware of how. I was fine with that. I never wanted to make a name for myself, unlike Colt who would soon become one of the darkest timelines in Cartleigh’s history.

  I entered the building without any fanfare. The security guards didn’t give me any real notice other than to check me in. Once they dialed up to the mayor’s office, Colt got off the elevator soon after. He was dressed in a checked dark-brown suit that made him look quite handsome even though he was scruffier and had more pronounced lines around his mouth and eyes. We shared one thing in common—the same type of shadows lurking around my eyes were tattooed under his.

  “Hello, Mercy.” He gave me a quick inspection, but there was a lack of sympathy in his gaze. He appeared indifferent to my presence, as if I hadn’t made an appointment.

  “Hello, Mayor Hahn.” I smiled brightly at one of the security guards. “Isn’t it nice the mayor met me here instead of sending his assistant…oops, I mean one of his staff down?”

  The guard bobbed his head nervously and pressed a button to let me walk through the other side. Colt straightened his tie and tugged on his cuffs while he eyed me.

  “Thank you for taking time out of your busy schedule to meet with me. You must be inconvenienced by not having an assistant since she’s indisposed.” I curled my shot arm to my chest.

  He cleared his throat and glanced around. “We have a lot to talk about. Instead of talking in my office, would you mind if we went to the tenth-floor sitting area? It has a nice view of the mountains.”

  I expected him to have me in his office since it was his space and it would give him a sense of power, but he might want as many witnesses as possible in case I had a bad reaction of some sort. He had to know by now I was always in control and not ruled by my emotions. But then again, why would he care to know the real me when he had ripped away all the pieces that made up me for his enjoyment? I would continue to let him think he was in charge to make it easier for me when he found out I had conned him.

  “Sure. It will be nice to see the mountains with the snow on their peaks.” I let him press the button for the elevator to take us up.

  The ride was short and quick. We stopped on the tenth floor, and the elevator opened to a wall of windows with a spectacular view like he said. A Christmas tree decorated with lights and ornaments was mounted in the corner. He indicated to the seating near the windows, which even out in the open gave off a secluded vibe. The chair I chose was high enough I could ease into the seat without much energy. Colt sat after I did and crossed his ankles and rested his hands on the arms of the chair.

  It felt odd not crossing my leg over the other, but my cuts kept me from doing so. I tucked my legs together and folded my hands on my knees. I would treat this like business and keep my emotions out of it so I could walk away unaffected by the damage I left behind.

  “Do you feel as awkward as I do?” He relaxed in his chair even as he gripped the arms.

  “Awkward how? Because I was attacked and shot by your assistant and lover? Or because you never saw or contacted me after my assault, especially after how involved we’ve been sexually?” I remained upright in case I had to suddenly stand.

  “Both. It’s been a hell of a week.” He exhaled and flexed his fingers. “Poor Agnes is delusional and—”

  “Delusional?” I snorted. “Because she broke into my house and threatened and shot me or because you’ll make it seem she’s unbalanced because of her intimate relationship with you?” I tapped my thumbs on one another. “She told me quite the story about you when she held me at gunpoint.”

  “She’s unwell.” He shrugged. “I admit I ignored the signs, but I never expected her to—”

  “Colton, it’s time to be honest with one another. I know all the details about your relationship with her and how long it’s been going on.” I made a tsking sound in between my teeth. “You want Agnes to be diagnosed unwell so no one will believe her when she tells the world you started abusing her when she was twelve.”

  “It’s my word against hers.” He cracked his neck from side to side like he was ready to fight.

  His ridiculous response, a way to intimidate, was laughable. How could he be so obtuse after I was able to handle a hysterical woman with a gun who almost killed me? Did he really have such a poor opinion of my gender? He must have if he thought he had gotten away with manipulating Agnes for so long, and me giving him a pass on my rape.

  “If you think this will endear you to me, then you need to reevaluate yourself. Or unless you don’t care what I think because you’re finished with me.” I wiggled my toes to stop them from cramping, which they had a habit of doing ever since the attack.

  “I enjoy your…company, but these recent events with Agnes and talk around town and constant mentions in the media may have lasting damage.”

  “Damage for you?” I shook my head, amused.

  He lowered his hand to mine and squeezed. “What we had was temporary just lik
e your stay here. Once the deal with Alzmeya goes through, you’ll be gone.”

  “What if I decided to stay? Ari would like me to.” I knocked his hand away and stretched out my legs.

  The twitch near the corner of his mouth was barely noticeable, but I watched his face carefully. Perhaps he was jealous of Ari because he didn’t like to think another man in his territory would have me like he did. Or maybe I was the one he didn’t want around.

  “Are you and he together?” He shifted forward, letting his legs bracket mine.

  I was still unconcerned by his physical move and simply folded my legs to one side. “The question you want to ask is if I’m fucking the good veterinarian. That’s my business and not yours.”

  “If you stick around, it might be.” He tapped his knee to mine.

  “You really think after all that’s happened between us, I’ll let you inside my body again?”

  “That’s a strange way of speaking.” The lines on his face spread to his forehead.

  “Blame my boss. When I’m around him, my speech differs because I combine English and Russian, his language. You do know Mr. Zeldovich has been in Cartleigh since Thanksgiving. He arrived after you left for Washington DC.”

  “I heard he was here but haven’t seen him yet.” He drew back and looked toward the elevators. “You’re here to tell me he wants to meet with me?”

  “No. If he meets with you, he may kill you. I’d rather keep you alive and well because if you’re dead, you can’t suffer.”

  “Suffer?” He shifted until his head met the chair.

  “Did you really think I returned to Cartleigh after all the years for a business deal? I want this town to die, not thrive. I’m here for payback for my rape and Marina’s death.” I refolded my legs and tapped the side of my shoe to his. “Everything I let you do to me is to complete my revenge. You’re finished.”

  He smirked, but it lacked an air of satisfaction. He had to wonder how I would finish him because him fucking me wasn’t scandalous, unlike his relationship with Agnes.

  “Care to explain how you’ve finished me? You mean my career?”

  “Everything you can think of and more.” I stared out the window at the beautiful scenery instead of the ugliness of the person across from me as I revealed all. “I came here to avenge Marina. But it was an excuse. I needed a reason to take you down because—”

  “You still think I raped you when we were kids.” He growled low in his throat.

  “It’s a fact.” A cramp hit my calf, but I made a fist, jabbing my nails in the flesh of my thumb. “I don’t have physical proof from that night you assaulted me, but I do have enough evidence of recent events to make up for it.”

  “Evidence of what? Us fucking?”

  “Like I just said, what I have on you had nothing to do with us fucking.” I opened my purse and took out a thumb drive. “I let you fuck me so I could get close to you.” I tossed the drive at him. “I have copies of everything on that drive.”

  “You’re blackmailing me?”

  “If you like to think of it as blackmail, go ahead.” I turned my attention back to him. The twitch in his cheek was more noticeable. “Remember the night you invited me to your house for dinner and had too much to drink and passed out? Before I left, I had a nice tour of your home office and your laptop. I found some interesting documents regarding St. Anthony’s and emails between you and Father Chavis.” I brushed the end of my hair under my mouth and smiled. “With you being such a Catholic, I’m surprised you would break such an important commandment—thou shalt not steal.”

  He tried but failed at playing off his shock. He just cracked his knuckles and then waved at a woman who passed us. He then turned back to me, his face a nicer shade of red than before. “Is that all?”

  “There’s more. I could keep you in suspense and let you see how much I have in private where no one can see your reaction, but I want to see you crumble now.” I went to flip my hair, but he grabbed my wrist.

  “Careful, Colton Monroe.” I tugged, but he tightened his grip.

  “Tell me everything,” he said through gritted teeth.

  Playing tug of war with him was silly so I laid my arm down, with him still possessing it. Let him try and mark me in anger. At this point, any bruising from him would have Yakim taking action, but hopefully it wouldn’t come to that because I didn’t want Yakim’s hands on this.

  “A camera filmed us having sex in the prayer room at St. Anthony’s and the women’s bathroom at the Grand Oaks. I can’t believe how naïve you were to think I wouldn’t take videos and pictures of us in the basement of Victus.” I giggled loud enough it echoed off the walls and windows around us.

  He squeezed until a hiss left me, and I moved toward him to relieve the pressure. If he lost control in public, all the better. But before he twisted my wrist enough to cause the most pain, he released me and pulled away in disgust. “You’re a sad woman. If Marina was alive, she would think the same. The things she said about you…” He shook his head and looked out the window. “I didn’t kill her. She had an unfortunate accident. I loved her.” He turned back and glared at me. “I never loved you, would never love you.”

  “I never wanted your love.” That much was true. I wanted his respect. He never gave me both but did to others like Marina and even Karine. What I lacked, they had.

  Why?

  I kept from blurting it out because if I did, he would answer in a way that would do the most emotional damage to me. I was strong enough to bear his insults, but I wanted to leave with as much as power as when I first arrived in Cartleigh in September.

  “You still want me even though you’ll try and convince yourself it’s not true.” He slid the thumb drive into his interior jacket pocket. “Your deranged plan to bring me down won’t matter. I have friends in high places who make things disappear.”

  At least he said things and not people. That may be the case for him, but I wasn’t without friends, either. Rather than make him aware, I would keep those facts to myself.

  “You forget Agnes and Karine.”

  “Agnes has a history of mental illness.” He shifted to the edge of his chair. “Her family will take care of her and her delusions. I’ll work with Brody to make sure she’s taken care of. Karine wouldn’t have it any other way.”

  When he stood, I did the same. I wouldn’t let him tower over me. I would leave him first and have the last word. I kept my sore arm at my side even though it throbbed. I was well aware of the sacrifice I made for this meeting. There was little left to be said that would cause maximum damage to Colt. But I would try. I wasn’t a quitter.

  “I wasn’t going to bring it up because I thought everything I told you would be enough, but since I’m not getting through to you, I must speak my mind.”

  “You haven’t been speaking your mind this entire time?” He crossed his arms and sent me a pityingly look.

  It didn’t take much to enrage me, but the way he stood there patronizing and lackadaisical made me want to slap him in the face or kick him in the groin. But physical violence wouldn’t accomplish much. Emotional manipulation was so much better.

  “I really wasn’t going to, but since you’re stubborn, I don’t have much of a choice.”

  He rolled his eyes. “If this is about what we did in New York —”

  “It’s a moot point because when it comes out, it will have lasting damage to your career.” I held up my hand when he tried to interrupt me. “You may not be…embarrassed or ashamed of fucking me in a church or stealing from the parish, but what will your constituents say when they find out that you fucked Karine a few weeks after Marina’s death and the outcome of that affair?”

  “She told you about that slip up?”

  I was close to dragging my hands through my hair because I was frustrated by the type of response I wasn’t getting from him. I wanted him to fall to his knees in pain. I would expect nothing less.

  “She told me that and more. How does it
feel to have another man raise your child as his own? Or you just don’t care and pretend you don’t have a daughter with a married woman? You expect the public to forgive you for the indiscretion? You think when Brody finds out Briella isn’t his biological daughter, he won’t divorce Karine and try not to destroy you like I’ve wanted to do all these years?”

  He didn’t fall to his knees, but the blood drained from his face, and he lost his balance. He sat back in the chair and blinked a few times.

  “Bingo,” I whispered, although it would have been so nice to twist the knife in more.

  “Strange Karine never told you about Briella or how you never put two and two together when she got pregnant after your night together.” I tapped my cheek. “Or maybe it wasn’t just one night for you two. Maybe you’ve been fucking her all this time and keeping poor Brody in the dark while you were screwing.” I slipped behind his chair and ran my fingernail down the side of his neck. “It’s pretty sick to fuck two sisters without them knowing, especially when you were with Marina. Then I come along and you were stupid enough to fall for, or rather fall into my pu—”

  “Shut up, cunt.” He slapped my hand hard enough it stung.

  I waved it, not really worried he would resort to violence since we were in public. But I’d misjudged Agnes. Also, the pain in my wounded arm was growing by the second, which made me more irritable than courageous with my taunts.

  I expected him to bolt up from the chair, but he leaned over his knees and held his head in his hands. One more push from me and he would be on his knees. But then I would be a bully, exactly like him. It might bring me pleasure to see him at his worst, and for anyone to witness it who walked by, but it would be petty.

  “I could say so much more, speak my mind, but it would be more of the same. Things are going to get difficult for you, and I don’t just mean your shadiness with Father Chavis or your sex escapades with me and the Yeaton sisters.” I leaned down close enough to whisper in his ear but had enough space just in case he tried to slap me again. “The residents of Cartleigh might forgive you for all of it, but what might have them vote you out is the failure with Alzmeya. My boss will announce on Monday he’s pulling out. All those local jobs will be gone. Poof. Never meant to be. So sad since you’ve said for over a year you were the one responsible for Alzmeya coming to Cartleigh. Now it’s a failure, which makes you one.”