50 Shades of Pink Read online

  “Is this your way of thanking me for last night?” I asked, my eyelids fluttering closed as she dusted my cheeks with blush.

  Her hand cupping my chin tightened. “Maybe it’s just an excuse for me to keep touching you. Now hush and let me finish.”

  I had a ton of unanswered questions, specifically about last night and this morning. Would it change things between us? Had she brought me here to soften me up so I would fall in her arms more willingly and cementing my support in her favor? Turbulent thoughts and doubts filled my head. She could toss me aside if she wanted to. She found my so-called innocence enticing, and now that she had me, she might move to something better.

  I hid my growing dread, pretending nothing had changed between us. Victoria remained composed like usual. She didn’t kiss or embrace me while we dressed. I didn’t take the initiative either. The fear of being rebuffed stopped me.

  We left the guesthouse and walked up to the main house. I almost reached out to take her hand, but stopped, afraid of her rejection.

  We were met by Regina and Damien and his family eating at the dining room table. They were a cheerful bunch, much like last night.

  “Go ahead and eat. I’m going to visit with my uncle.” Victoria sat her palm on my back. Her simple touch settled my jumpy stomach.

  She left the room. I sat, eating little, not that anyone noticed. It was more than an hour until Victoria came back down the stairs, her eyes tinged with red. She didn’t acknowledge me and asked to speak to Damien in private.

  Lee and his wife joined the group soon after. I made the excuse of needing to use the bathroom but didn’t get farther than the hallway. I stood there lost. For the first time in a long time I wanted to see my parents. I took out my cell to call home.

  “Is everything all right, dear? Having trouble finding the bathroom?” Regina came over to my side.

  “Ah, I was just checking to see if I had any messages.” I lifted my phone as proof.

  “You’re just like Victoria. She’s always on the phone or on her tablet she carries with her everywhere,” she said and rolled her eyes.

  Not expecting her reaction, I laughed. “I guess she has to be on call and always reachable by phone or email.”

  “She has a closer relationship with her electronic devices than she does with people.”

  She waited for some type of response from me, perhaps clarification or agreement. I didn’t want to overstep my bounds but I couldn’t let a statement like that go unnoticed.

  “Victoria isn’t as affectionate as you or your sons. Has that always been the case?” I asked.

  “Are you asking as her future biographer or as her friend?” Regina lowered voice had a more serious edge.

  Saying I was Victoria’s lover or even a fling at this point probably wasn’t wise. I chose the safer option. “Even though we’re working together in a professional way, I consider her a friend.”

  Regina exhaled hard, as if she had been holding her breath. “She changed when her parents’ died. She still blames herself for their accident.”

  “Why?” Victoria had yet to bring up her parents, and I hadn’t thought to ask.

  “She thought she should have died with them.” Regina twisted one of her rings around her finger. “The reason she wasn’t with them was because she had a horrible fight with her father. As a punishment, he left her behind to celebrate her thirteenth birthday alone.”

  “She was punished because of a fight?” I had my share of fights with my parents, but they never punished me as a result.

  Regina sat her palm to her stomach. “She was punished because of what led to the fight. Her father caught her doing something unacceptable in his eyes.”

  What horrible thing could she have done as a twelve-year-old that her father would have a meltdown over? I instantly thought of drugs or alcohol, but Victoria didn’t seem the type to abuse those things, even as a prepubescent girl.

  “Are you two having a nice chat?” Victoria stood a few feet away.

  Regina turned to her niece, not startled or shaken by being caught. “Yes, we are. I invited Lindsay to come again the next time you visit.” She drew me in for a hug. “Take care of her,” she whispered and approached Victoria, hiding the fact she had lied to her face.

  Victoria’s gaze slid to mine. I held her stare for once, not breaking away under pressure.

  Regina drew Victoria down the hall. Once they were out of sight, I wilted against the wall, clearing my breath lodged in my throat.

  ***

  On the car ride back to the city, my cramps hit me full force. I swallowed back a moan, not wanting Victoria to see me in pain. She didn’t engage me in conversation or ask any questions. I suffered silently, both in body and mind. I felt awkward and strange around her, not knowing how I should act now that we had crossed a line.

  I hugged my stomach, shifting on the seat as an ache stabbed my lower back. The motion of the car added to my discomfort.

  “Do I need to tell the driver to pull over to the side? You look like you’re going to be sick.” She pressed the back of her hand on my forehead.

  I closed my eyes, enjoying her touch. “I don’t feel too hot, but you don’t have to worry about me puking.”

  “Is it because you’re sore?” She tucked me to her side.

  The tension in my lower back lessened. I also felt lightheaded, but it wasn’t because of my agony. “I have cramps. I’m not sore because of what we did in the guest house.”

  “You mean our fucking?”

  I opened my eyes at the amusement coloring her voice. “Exactly.”

  She stroked the side of my neck. “So prim and proper now. But you weren’t last night.”

  It suddenly was much warmer than a second ago. “Now you want to talk about us fu-fucking and how it changes things between us?” Please don’t say it was a mistake.

  She slid her hand under my nape and squeezed. “Things don’t have to change just because I’ve seen you naked and know your taste.”

  “You failed to mention about having your tongue and fingers inside me,” I shot off the zinger, proud of my come back.

  She snickered and pressed our foreheads together. “What am I going to do with you?”

  I grabbed her by the waist and took her mouth in a firm kiss. She inhaled, her eyes widening. Pleasure bounced inside me knowing I could affect her the same way she did me.

  “Do you still want to go forward with the interview?” I asked softly, hating to bring it up, but I couldn’t leave it hanging without a definite answer.

  She moved her face away, but kept her hand fixed in my hair. “We’ll proceed as planned. My aunt gave me her blessing.”

  “What about your cousins? Do they know about Colette like Regina does?” I thought back to the conversation I had overheard between Victoria and Regina. How much did Victoria share with her aunt?

  “They had no idea. Aunt Regina knows more than she should.”

  “She doesn’t have a high opinion of Colette.” Pushing Victoria could get me shut down, but I refused to remain in the dark.

  Her hold on my neck slackened, but she didn’t release me. “She can’t stand Colette. She blames her for the reason why I fled to England.” Victoria dug her fingers in my skin, her nails jabbing deep.

  I reached around and tugged on Victoria’s hand to stop her from leaving a bruise. “Why didn’t you tell her the truth, how Colette molested you—”

  She wrenched her hand away. “How many times do I have to tell you? She didn’t molest me.”

  “You’re going to deny she took advantage of you as a lonely fourteen-year-old?” I shifted away, putting space between us. “I don’t understand why you keep defending her.”

  She exhaled loudly and tapped her fist on her knee, showing her agitation. I guess some progress had been made because she no longer hid her feelings from me. She sent me a furious look that would stop people in their tracks and make them turn the other way. I wouldn’t be that person. The self-im
posed walls she had erected between us had tumbled down the moment she had kissed me and took me to her bed.

  “I’m not defending her. The situation isn’t as black and white as you’ve made it out to be.” She tugged on her necklace. “She seduced me as a minor, but I let it continue for years, well past the age of consent. If she hadn’t become such a possessive and conniving bitch, or I hadn’t fallen in love with some else who died because of me, I might still be with Colette now.”

  “You’re carrying around a lot of guilt after all these years.” I pulled her hand away from her throat. She didn’t reject my hold. It gave me the courage to say what was on my mind. “You blame yourself for accepting Colette’s advances when you were a teenager, and the death of your lover in college. That’s the real reason you left the country and stayed away for so long.”

  She entwined our fingers together. “I thought running away hundreds of miles from everyone and everything I knew would help me recover from the emotional hell I was in.” She shuddered and blinked rapidly.

  I wanted to push for more information, but my heart cracked as this normally unflappable, confident woman broke down next to me. There would be enough time to learn all I could about Victoria and those dark secrets she held within. Lifting our combined hands to my mouth, I peppered kisses on her knuckles, turning her hand until my mouth met her palm. As I kissed up her arm, she clasped me by the head and gave me a punishing kiss, taking my mouth with such force that my teeth scraped her bottom lip. She gasped in what I thought might be pain, but she didn’t stop kissing me.

  Wrapping my arms around her, I lay back on the seat with her on top of me. Her hands roamed over my chest, releasing the buttons from my shirt. I lifted my hands under her skirt and found her bare and open to receive my touch.

  “Make me forget,” she whispered, and rocked in my hand cupping her moist flesh, the tips of my fingers wet with her arousal.

  Pulling open my blouse, and unlatching my bra, she palmed my breast while I traced her opening, slick with her desire. With inexperienced hands, I searched for the hard nubbin of flesh that would make her cry out my name like I did when she made me come every which way with her mouth.

  My reward arrived when she sucked down on the side of my neck and clamped down on my hand. She moaned my name, bucking once and then twice as her release came on hard and fast, leaving a damp trail of her desire behind.

  Chapter Twelve

  “I’m going to have to take another shower.” I giggled around Victoria’s mouth as our kiss of goodbye had gone on for a good ten minutes.

  Taking my hand off her shoulder, she slipped my finger in her mouth, sucking down. I swallowed hard, both aroused and taken aback. My fingers had been nestled inside of Victoria for the remainder of the journey home. I made her climax more times than I could count as she gave me directions on how to please her. She returned the favor with her long, drugging kisses, and tonguing my breasts. I came alone from her kissing my breasts and sucking on a very sensitive part of my neck. A few times she tried for some below the waist action, which I nixed because I wasn’t comfortable with her playing in between my legs while I had my period. Her way to substitute was more than satisfying.

  She released my finger with a soft pop and then flicked her tongue along the ridge of my palm. “Next time I’m sucking on more than just your finger.”

  “Where else?” I asked, with a bit of attitude.

  She cupped the sides of my face, her thumbs dragging back and forth under my chin. “I’ll suck on your clit, and I’ll teach you to do the same to me.”

  A deep throb fluctuated near the spot she mentioned. “That sounds naughty.”

  “You love when I talk dirty.” She nipped my bottom lip and circled her thumbs down, circling near the edge of my collarbone. “I marked you.”

  “Where?” I asked, tilting my head to the side in the hopes she would leave more kisses there.

  “Hickies in all the right places.” She dipped her tongue in my mouth and caressed the inside of my cheek.

  I bit down on her tongue in retaliation. She sighed, and with one last tongue stroke, sat back.

  I poked the side of my neck where it was sore. “It’s that bad?”

  She gifted me an indulgent smile. “You’ll want to keep your hair down for a few days.”

  “You really like my hair down, don’t you?” I rolled my eyes playfully and grabbed my purse off the floor.

  “I prefer you naked with your hair down your back.” She dropped a kiss on my mouth.

  I opened my purse with the excuse of searching for my apartment keys. “So here’s where we go our separate ways.”

  “Until tomorrow night.”

  “What’s tomorrow night?” I asked, keeping my eyes locked on my purse.

  She tugged on my hair, making me meet her gaze. “Why are you shy now after everything we’ve done together?”

  “I don’t know.” I shrugged, not sure how to put into words about my sudden meekness.

  “For now we’re enjoying ourselves. That’s why I’m taking you out to dinner to make up for the one I cancelled.”

  “Is this a business dinner to discuss the interview or more along the lines of something personal?” I was willing to keep our personal relationship separate from our professional one, but I needed to know what she thought.

  “We’ll treat it like a date.” She stroked under my ear.

  “And then what?” I licked my lips.

  “After dinner, you’ll come back to my place and spend the night. I have so much more I want to teach you.” She tweaked my chin and kissed me.

  I swallowed back a moan of frustration. I didn’t want to end things now and go our separate ways. I rested my hands on her upper thighs and pressed gently. “Why should we wait until tomorrow night to see each other again? If you come up to my place now, we can start our date early.”

  “If I go upstairs with you now, we’ll stay locked in your bedroom and forget the world exists.”

  “So? That doesn’t sound bad.” I didn’t want to leave Victoria now that she started to trust me.

  “It’s tempting, but I’ll have to decline.” She kissed me on the cheek. “I’ll pick you up tomorrow at six o’clock.”

  I nodded although the rejection stung.

  “And Lindsay, be careful with Colette. She can be very dangerous when crossed.” The warning in her voice was more than abundantly clear.

  “I’m probably not even a blip on her radar anymore.” I kissed Victoria, rubbing my mouth over hers. She returned the kiss, but no tongue action this time.

  As I moved back, she pressed her cheek to mine. “Don’t take any chances with her. If she knows you’re on my side now, she’ll make your life miserable. You have to make a decision and soon about leaving Virago. We’ll discuss your future tomorrow.”

  A chill traveled up my spine. “Should I be worried?”

  “I don’t mean to scare you. Just be cautious.” She kissed the corner of my mouth and then moved away.

  I nodded and opened my door, stepping outside. The driver handed me my bag. I walked around to Victoria’s side, but instead of rolling down her window, she waved. The car then drove away, leaving me in front of my building. I didn’t linger and went inside, expecting Jayden to grill me once I opened the door. I entered my apartment to silence. He wasn’t there.

  My cell pinged with a text message. I dropped my bags on the floor, reaching inside my purse to check my phone. Scanning the text from Victoria, I smiled, thrilled by her message. It was short and to the point, reminding me about the time to be ready for tomorrow when she picked me up for our date. She also thanked me for a memorable weekend.

  I hugged myself and sighed, leaning back against the couch to re-read her text. A loud knock on the front door interrupted me. The door swung open and Colette stood in the doorway with a scarf around her head and wearing a long leather jacket.

  “How did you get in my building without a key?” Damn it. Why didn’t I l
ock the door?

  She closed the door. “I let myself in as someone was leaving.”

  There was no point in asking how she knew where I lived since she had access to my personal information. I’d play it cool even though I was freaking out on the inside. “Why are you here?”

  She stepped further in the room. “I wanted to check on you and see how your overnight trip with Victoria went.”

  Oh no. I backed away. “How did you know.…”

  She slashed her arm in the air. “Don’t try denying it. I saw both of you cuddling in the back seat of a car a few minutes ago. You went with her to see her aunt and uncle yesterday.”

  “You’re spying on us?” The floor fell out from under me and I slammed into one of the end tables with my hip. Pain ricocheted down my leg.

  “Just Victoria.” She stopped a foot away from me as her burning gaze cut to my chest. Her lips dropped into an ugly scowl and she jabbed her finger at my neck. “She marked you. Did she fuck you last night?”

  “That’s none of your business!” I smacked her hand away. “How dare you come in my home and acc—”

  She grabbed me by the back of my hair. I yelped, trying to jerk out of her grip. She twisted me around until my back met her front and she captured both my wrists in one hand while she clamped on my hair.

  “Calm down before you hurt yourself,” she said in a soft, venomous tone.

  “Let me go.” I squirmed in her embrace, panting from the exertion.

  She wrenched back my head and I whimpered in pain. “You’re acting like a child. All I wanted to do was have a friendly conversation about your trip with Victoria, but based on your angry reaction to my presence here, I can assume you aren’t interested in working with me to help benefit your career.”

  “She told me what you did to her, you bitch.” I snarled, ready to spit in her face.

  The sound of the door unlocking saved me. Colette flung me away.